Donna's Dry Vagina - Just Jill

Just Jill is the creation of Jill Cohen Morris. Jill is an avid rambler and mother of two from Toronto, Canada with a remarkable zest for life and a fabulous sense of humor.

Dear Just Jill,

I'm just going to say it … no beating around the bush (pun intended) …. Vaginal dryness!!

I know it is a symptom of menopause, so I'm not worried anything else is happening. However, that does not discount the everyday discomfort, the itchiness, and the painful sex. I'm yearning for the days when I wasn't terrified that sex would hurt.

I'm at my wit's end … enough is enough!! Does this go away on its own?

I need your help, Sole Sisters!!

Looking for any suggestions. I am wondering what, if anything, has worked for you?

What's a gal to do?

Sincerely,
Dry Donna

Sole Sister Advice & Comments

• Astroglide for nookies.
  
  
• Vagifem or an unbranded product that is the same. I recently heard that pharmacists can prescribe this in the UK but only in post-menopausal women, which is ridiculous as vaginal atrophy is an early symptom of perimenopause. Vaginal atrophy (dryness, itchiness, and painful sex) is due to the drop in estrogen that can start years before the actual date of menopause - usually one year after your last period. This atrophy will not go away on its own. Still, a straightforward course of estradiol helps. I was started on 1 tablet inserted vaginally a day for 2 weeks, then down to 2 tablets a week, which turned it around. It helped deal with vaginal dryness and decreased the frequency of UTIs.
  
  
• As a rule, no scented laundry detergent for underwear! It is hard to find unscented feminine hygiene products in the UK!
  
  
• I totally understand. I got so tired of scratching myself raw, the red skin, and feeling uncomfortable that I went to see my Gynecologist. She prescribed a localized estrogen treatment to treat symptoms of vaginal dryness in and around the vagina. It really helps, so I would suggest conversing with your doctor.
  
  
• A doctor friend told me that topical estrogen is what she prescribes the most for women in menopause. It is not recommended for everyone, so definitely check with your doctor. I also went through a dry spell, and I can confidently say that it did not last!
  
  
• Topical estrogen. In Canada Vagifem in Europe Ovestin. It helps a lot.
  
  
• A great company called Damiva makes all kinds of safe, natural products. "Lip Balm for your other Lips," hahaha. Toronto-based company, great people, great products!
  
  
• Vagifem lite. Game changer! See your doctor.
  
  
• Get a prescription for topical estrogen, or there is a product called Gina which you can buy over the counter but is pretty similar. Makes a big difference
  
  
• In the last year, I, too, have gotten topical estrogen, which has helped. I first had Vagifem but was unhappy with how much plastic waste it created with the individual applicators. So, I switched to Estragyn vaginal cream, which is just as effective. It makes much less waste because it has a washable applicator and is gram for gram, about 1/10 the cost. I'm in BC, Canada, where we pay our prescription costs if uninsured. My sister has tried a wide range of natural products and eventually settled on coconut oil as her go-to solution. Although somewhat messy, it works best for her.
  
  
• This is so timely! It's like I could have written it myself. I will call my doctor in the morning to get an appointment to look into Vagifem. If I may share a story. About 5 years ago, I was just minding my own business after having a relatively simple Menopause. I had an IUD for about 5 years as I had been bleeding heavily before that and was somewhat anemic. So the actual removal of the IUD was quite painful and traumatic and involved a separate visit to Women's College Hospital when my doctor could not get it out. Scar tissue had grown over it, and it took the combined efforts of the doctor and two interns and an ultrasound to finally find it and get it out. It was humiliating and painful. Everything was going fine, and then one day, as I packed for my anniversary weekend in Niagara Falls, I started spotting rather heavily. I was alarmed, to say the least. I called my doctor on Monday, and she was also concerned; the next few months were an escalation of exams, ultrasounds, biopsies, etc., and although the spotting stopped after three days and never returned, the doctor wanted to be sure, and so did I. Four months later, I finally got in to see a Gynecology expert who was at least 85 years old. He looked at all the reports and tests but not at ME and told me I just "rubbed too hard," everything was fine, and he just put some coconut oil on my labia. I told him I am allergic to coconut, and he said, "Then use olive oil or Crisco for all it matters; you are just dry, that's all." I told him I knew what dry skin and abrasion bleeding are like and what spotting is, and this was definitely spotting. He blew me off and never looked me in the face, just at my file. He also never examined ME. I never even uncrossed my legs the whole visit. I left in tears and called my GP and told her. She said she was going to discontinue referring her patients to this guy and to call her if the spotting ever came back. It did not and has not, but this past week, I did have some very uncomfortable vacation sex and some bleeding, as described by several people above. I am so thankful for this group where I can safely ask questions and get real experience answers. I love you all.
  
  
• Replenish - a non-estrogen treatment.
  
  
• I am sure I am experiencing this to some degree (we have yet to speak about lube (LOL); if not, this is in my future, like everyone. Now I will know what to do about it. My approach has to be ignored and soldier on when it comes to menopause-related symptoms. It sounds silly, but I have always assumed there is no solution to aging problems, so try to ignore them. I don't think about it much, research it or talk to my doctor about it. This group makes me realize how silly that is. This is why conversations like this are so empowering.
  
  
• Very true. Always good to have a woman gynecologist because they push you to use these products instead of suffering.
  
  
• Highly recommend visiting Menopause Chicks with Shirley Weir for great information on all things menopause, especially her recommendations on vaginal dryness and the Health Canada-approved vaginal moisturizer with hyaluronic acid. She is an amazing resource for us and a strong advocate!
  
  
• Well, if we're getting real here. I, too, was experiencing itchiness and dryness, so my naturopath prescribed topical estrogen cream to use, and it helped, but I always had an itchy spot. I, too, used coconut oil regularly. This past spring, I went to an endometriosis specialist and wonderful gyno for an ultrasound, and she diagnosed me with lichens sclerosis. My mom has it. It's genetic and an autoimmune disorder. I have Betaderm steroid cream for it, which I rarely need to use, but it helps a lot. Getting that diagnosis was a real bummer, but it is manageable.

SSR doesn't endorse the advice, or content shared in this column. Our goal is to access the wisdom of our incredible Sole Sisters.

READ MORE > Just Jill, Rambler Cafe Blog