Jane Witherspoon is a Canadian expat adventurer, yoga instructor, and passionate rambler who recently relocated from Panama to Denia, Spain.
Do you ever feel that after you have worked towards and accomplished something that you doubt your abilities and achievement?
Welcome to my world. I have accomplished many things in my life and instead of celebrating these achievements there is anxiety and a feeling of being less capable than others.
The description I use to describe myself has always been “a woman of many talents, a master of none.” But I have come to a time in my life that I am questioning if I am doing myself a disservice with this disparaging assessment of my accomplishments. So how do I go about changing it?
Apparently, there is a name for this type of behavior - Imposter Syndrome. It is defined as: “a psychological occurrence in which people doubt their skills, talents, or accomplishments and have a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as frauds.
Despite external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this phenomenon do not believe they deserve their success or luck or they may think that they are deceiving others because they feel as if they are not as intelligent as they outwardly portray themselves to be.”
Many of us struggle with these feelings despite our accomplishments. We internalize that we are not special, our minds lead us to believe that we are lacking in knowledge or unique qualities that make us admirable even though those around us may see them clearly.
For as long as I can remember feelings of inadequacy have been my companion, moving through life without creating anything outstanding that I will be remembered for. Choosing to compare myself to others and their accomplishments, wishing I had the ability, drive, motivation to become outstanding at something. I am tired, tired of feeling unworthy of celebrating my milestones.
As I have become more self aware and choosing to purposely open up my mind to exploring who I am and what I am capable of, instead of allowing that old recording to continue running through my head I have come to this realization. We are all capable of incredible things.
So now as I look back, I can begin to accept through the phases of my life so far, through hard work, determination and sometimes overcoming obstacles, I have accomplished much to be proud of.
Will my skills or accomplishments change the world? No. Will I still struggle with accepting what I have achieved and will continue to create, accomplish and offer out into the world? Most definitely.
This is an ongoing journey but I will try and offer myself kindness and compassion while calming the judgment and self-doubt that plays in my mind. We all need to just find the boldness to say yes to accepting we are worthy, we are valued, each in our own way.
Has there been a time in your life when you have felt like an imposter?
― C. JoyBell C.
Leave a comment