Feeling Comfortable Naked - Jane's Mindful Musings

Jane Witherspoon is a Canadian expat adventurer, yoga instructor, and passionate rambler who recently relocated from Panama to Denia, Spain.

Recently I was watching one of Nomi’s Pics, a movie called Good Luck To You, Leo Grande starring Emma Thompson. Ramble on over and read Naomi’s review here in Rambler Cafe Blog.

After watching the movie, which I loved, I started thinking about my struggles with being comfortable in my naked body. Having grown up in a family where nudity was never discussed or displayed by my parents and by extension us, the children, we were never encouraged to embrace our bodies or to feel comfortable in our own skin.

This is not a statement of blame, my parents grew up believing in modesty and continued that legacy while also taking into consideration the overall acceptable behavior in society at that time. This can create a feeling of body shame from an early age that can take a lifetime to undo, if ever.

Throw in the awe inspiring transformation our bodies go through during the childbirth years and then midlife compounded with society's judgemental narrative on women and their bodies, it is no wonder we view our bodies in a negative light. We become ashamed to explore or expose the journey we have traveled that is written on our skin and the changes to our bodies.

Up until about 15 years ago, the thought of being naked by myself, let alone in front of others was horrifying to me. I met a man, who later became my husband, who embraced his nakedness and was proud of his body. He would regularly go swimming at a local lake that had a dock known for being a nudist swimming dock. After months of waffling on whether to join him, I finally decided to go and embrace the experience.

Full disclosure, I did wear a two piece bathing suit surrounded by naked bodies and feeling like the odd one out. Gradually, I would start to remove my top and waves of self-consciousness would envelop me but as time passed it became more natural but with a continued feeling of discomfort.

We live in such a strange culture where it is socially acceptable for “young” women to walk around in clothing that exposes more than it covers but full nudity is frowned upon, especially in the mature demographic.

A friend and I traveled through Morocco together about 10 years ago. Now in their culture people, and especially women, do not show any skin in public. During our travels we decided to visit a public bath house called a hamman, which has segregated days for women and men.

The experience was slightly traumatic for both of us as you must get naked before entering the steamy bathing space. Having never seen each other naked before, we giggled nervously and looked everywhere but at each other. The beautiful part was these women, who are not allowed to show skin in public, were completely at ease in their nudity among the other women and children.

So fast forward to my current life. We are currently living on the Southern Coast of Spain, where European vacationers come for sun, sand and sea. All the beaches are tops optional and many women of all ages and sizes walk the beaches proudly topless.

Have I taken advantage of this freedom? No, much to my husband’s dismay. Will I do it one day? Maybe, but not without some inner turmoil. Do I stand naked in front of the mirror and truly look at myself in all my beauty? Yes, but not always with a kind eye.

While preparing to write this blog, I asked the other Sole Sister Rambler Founders their opinion of me posing naked for the Mindful Musings tile I made for this blog, feeling that I should walk the talk, as I always do on my intentions. I am still processing the idea that I thought about and am going to share a picture of myself naked. 

We had a discussion about whether it was appropriate. There were mixed responses including concern, because I am a small woman and that seeing my body may be discouraging for those that are self conscious of their lumps and bumps.

I sat with this for a while and came to the conclusion that we all have our insecurities and fears, voluptuous, thin or any other shape in-between. I think my breasts are too small, I have no waist and no bum … but this is a huge step for me in overcoming my insecurities and we should support and applaud any and all women no matter their shape or size who put themselves out there in a positive and affirming way embracing who they are. Naked or not. 

As always, these are my personal musings, struggles and journey that I express and invite kind thoughtful conversation on the intention. They may not always resonate with your thoughts or beliefs but it creates an open dialogue. You may be happy and feel no need to express your nudity but for me it is a journey of releasing my own body shaming and taking my power back.

And so my Sole Sisters, as you ramble through your week, challenge yourself to find time to be naked, or not. Truly look at yourself and think kind thoughts as you revel in your beauty.