Audrey Hepburn is often quoted as saying, "The beauty of a woman grows with passing years." I have always loved that quote, but I often wonder how many of us truly believe it when we look in the mirror.
There are countless moments throughout the day when we catch our reflection—walking past a shop window, glancing in the rear-view mirror, checking ourselves before stepping out of an elevator, or pausing in front of the bathroom mirror before beginning the day. Whether we realise it or not, most of us instinctively evaluate what we see. It's human nature.
As the years pass, our reflections begin to change. Fine lines appear where smooth skin once was. Wrinkles deepen around eyes that have laughed and cried. Our skin loses some of its elasticity, our hair changes colour and texture, and our bodies no longer respond quite the way they once did.
In the last twenty years, the beauty industry has certainly recognised this stage of life, offering endless products and promises to slow the ageing process. While I appreciate products that nourish and care for mature skin, I also believe we need to be mindful of the messages we absorb. Too often we are encouraged to focus on what needs fixing, rather than celebrating the incredible privilege of growing older.
If I'm being completely honest, I still catch myself looking in the mirror through the lens of society's definition of beauty. I notice the lines before I notice the smile. I see the changes before I recognise the wisdom. It is so easy to focus on perceived flaws instead of appreciating the woman who has earned every one of them.
Since the introduction of Zoom and FaceTime, I can't count the number of conversations I've had with girlfriends where, instead of focusing on each other, we comment on our necks, our wrinkles, or the angle of the camera creating a double chin. It's almost become our opening conversation.
Why do we do this?
Why is our first instinct to criticise ourselves rather than celebrate the life reflected back at us?
Perhaps it is because we have spent decades being told that youth equals beauty. Yet I have come to believe that beauty has very little to do with smooth skin and everything to do with the life that has been lived behind it.
Every smile line tells a story of joy. Every wrinkle reflects years of laughter, tears, resilience, and love. Every silver hair is a reminder that we are still here, still learning, still growing.
Our reflection is only one small part of who we are.
The real beauty lies in our kindness, our compassion, our resilience, our wisdom, and our capacity to continue showing up for ourselves and for those we love. None of those qualities can be measured by a mirror.
When we stand before our reflection each morning, perhaps we can choose to see it differently. Instead of searching for imperfections, we can use that moment as an invitation to practise self-love. To be gentle with ourselves. To acknowledge the journey that has brought us here and honour the woman looking back at us.
After all, the way we speak to ourselves matters. Those quiet thoughts we have in front of the mirror influence how we move through the rest of the day. They shape our confidence, our energy, and the way we show up in the world.
Sole Sister Ramblers began as a passion project to create a safe space for women in midlife and beyond to share their stories and connect with one another. Over the years, this remarkable community of women from around the world has continually reminded me that we are so much more than our appearance.
We are women who have loved deeply, overcome challenges, raised families, built careers, travelled, reinvented ourselves, and continued to grow. We are strong in both mind and body. We have gathered wisdom through experience and found resilience through life's many twists and turns.
That is beauty.
So, my beautiful Sole Sisters, as you Ramble out into your week, I invite you to pause the next time you catch your reflection. Instead of looking for what has changed, look for everything that remains. Smile at the woman smiling back at you. See her strength. See her courage. See the life she has lived and the life she is still creating.
Because you are not becoming less beautiful with age.
You are becoming more fully yourself.
And there is nothing more beautiful than that.
I like feeling that I am a different person now
than I was when I was 20. I like looking
in the mirror and seeing that evidence.
I think my face represents who I am.
I like it. - Justine Bateman
I am baffled that anyone might not
think women get more beautiful as
they get older. Confidence comes
with age, and looking beautiful comes
from the confidence someone has
in themselves. - Kate Winslet
READ MORE > Jane's Mindful Musings, Rambler Cafe Blog.
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