A Rom Com & Cat Indulgence - JT's Tales From the Trail

Jill Thomas is a rambler, traveler, and storyteller with a big laugh who believes life takes her where she needs to go, no matter the roundabout path.

Today while rambling I was feeling guilty for spending the entire day in bed yesterday watching romantic comedies I have seen before and eating popcorn with butter and nutritional yeast (also known as nooch). This got me thinking about indulgence.

What is an indulgence? Eating ice cream for dinner? Skipping housework to go out with a friend? Buying new boots?

I tend to overindulge. I’ve always regarded it as one of my biggest failings. So, I think of indulgences as something I want to do less of, or of habits I want to overcome. But are they?

We all know that occasionally, indulging in our cravings helps us relax. However, I didn’t know until recently that indulging yourself also helps you build good habits. 

Researchers at the University of Zurich and Radboud University in the Netherlands recently published a paper on self-control and indulgence. They investigated the dominant narrative about self-control, which tells us that a happy life depends on putting our goals ahead of momentary pleasure. The researchers wondered if there is such a thing as too much self-control. 

The good news is that their research found that both hedonism and self-control contribute to our happiness in essential ways.

They defined hedonism as the ability to enjoy ourselves—specifically, the ability to experience pleasure without the distraction of intrusive thoughts. Hedonism is doing something you want and being fully in the moment with it.

They found that the happiest people don’t worry about what they should do when indulging themselves. They have more fun because guilt doesn’t inhibit them from enjoying the pleasurable thing they are doing.

This study also found that enjoying yourself without guilt or distraction is equally as crucial to your happiness as self-control. They call the secret power of enjoying pleasure without intruding negative thoughts your “hedonic capability.” They found that people with high hedonic capability have a higher sense of well-being and are less likely to suffer from depression and anxiety.

Of course, happiness is rarely found in abandoning all self-control and spending every day in bed binge watching out of date movies. And, most of us have some regrettable moments regarding over-indulgence. The key, the researchers said, is understanding that self-indulgence is equal to self-discipline in happiness and well-being and that the pursuit of hedonic pleasures needn't conflict with your hard work and long-term goals. Both are important and complement each other in achieving well-being and good health. 

Sounds easy. Of course, it's not. Reading a good book, eating fantastic food, or spending time with friends won't make us happier if we can't stay present with it.  And banishing those distracting thoughts about what you should be doing isn’t simple.

The study authors did not attempt an answer for the issue of intrusive thoughts, but this is where the more extensive psychology of self-regulation can help. And believe it or not, it may come back to self-control.

It turns out that self-control is the key to a healthy “hedonistic capability.” Being mindful of our hedonisms and redirecting our persistent negative self-talk about what we should be doing when doing something fun is a form of self-control. 

The more we practice having guilt-free fun, the better we get at mindfulness and the more relaxed we get. And then something fascinating happens: the better we get at mindfulness, the more present we become with what we do all the time. And that makes us much better at having fun and controlling our impulses.

It turns out that mindfulness and self-control are the keys to enjoying indulgences and are essential for your happiness. Intriguing right?

Tell us about your favorite ways to indulge in the comments!